“Life is calling, where will you go?”

22 September 2012

For nearly 4 years before I joined Peace Corps I was confident that this was the right decision for me. I’m adventurous. I can use a hole for a toilet because I enjoy camping. Adversity, no problem! During all those years at a desk studying for school, feeling my muscles atrophy from a lack of exercise I comforted myself knowing that when I was a Peace Corps Volunteer I would lead an exciting and active life. Ohhh yes, the grass is always greener.

I do not regret my decision to be a PCV, I know that my frustrations and discomforts are proof that I’m learning and improving my character. I know that there is a reason, some destiny of sorts, that has led me to live in Ethiopia, but I often find myself playing the “what if game.”

What if I had accepted my offer to serve in Mexico? Would that have been so bad to have an office job volunteer position rather than living in a small town where no one really wants to work (with or without you).
What if I had just gotten a job abroad and learned through a much quicker process what living abroad is all about? I could have gone to a place of my choosing (and probably be home already).

What if I had finished graduate school first? Would I still have wanted to be a PCV afterwards? Would the headache of a thesis be easier or harder? I could of had my M.S. by now!

Ethiopia is the epitome of an exotic culture. We have tribes of people that stretch their lips using plates, and the topless women, their bodies painted in natural dyes. We’ve got cute babies wandering alone everywhere, their bellies are often swollen from amoebas or because their muscles are not strong enough to hold their organs in place. We’ve got poverty folks! Honest to god poverty, and even if you aren’t poor you put on a sad face and rub your stomach so that the white person might give you some money. I live in Africa, a place that was previously only a series of memories I could recall from National Geographic magazines. This is no longer simply a remarkable photograph, an unimaginable culture, this is my life.  Living with these images is a lot more emotionally disturbing because I can’t flip the page and move on.